24 February 2012
The title for this text is about a passing of someone and the effect that it has given me.
forgive me, that this is another text about somebody dear who passed away yesterday. not related to me immediate, but near the surroundings of me and it just got my attention that this life is such a big mystery.
i had all these questions in my mind but i know there isn’t any answer to these great questions i’m asking.
where do you really go after death? who do you meet? is God there waiting for you to come to His doorstep and welcomes you with a big smile and hug? when we all have paid our respects, does he/she feel alone? lost? sad? sadder than us, because we tend to leave that person there?
maybe you have experienced someone dear to you that you care for, talked to all your life, had wonderful moments, even ones that seems like endless emotions of despair, anger. in the back of your mind, you know you will always have him/her by your side. and suddenly it hits you, he/she passes away, one minute here, and one minute disappear. in forever slumber, and not waking up anymore.
This Universe that is consists with energy all around us, and one day it can stop. without any warning or signs to let us be prepared. *sigh*
I’m actually wondering and thinking in my mind, as now i am still in this world, what should i really do? what is my contribution to this really big big world? oh dear Universe, i have been really thinking about all the things i have done, achieved, regret and still i want more out of it. I want to seek what makes my heart stand still. am i not grateful of the life i have? i think not. i am very grateful. but what i want is my life to be fulfilling. and i want to do that now. before its too late.
maybe when you’ve achieved something in life and you think this is enough for you. then good for you. but as for me because i haven’t really found it yet, i still want look, and i still want to treasure things. i still want to find great adventures while i can.
that irony of one person’s passing can affect so much to a person. in this case, is me. i just want to say that before i pass… i want to at least do as many things as possible before i pass. i just really want to enjoy the life i had, so when i look back when i’m a ghost or another energy in this earth, i would smile and said, ‘happily enough’.